Silly Man

My friend set his alarm for 6:30pm rather than 630am. Luckily I had my alarm set for 7:30am--had I not he would've been late for his 8:00am test. 7:30am. Off he was. Rushing and throwing clothes every where--a pair of jeans were thrown over my face, followed by a pair of boxers. The ones he wore the night before. That was enough to wake me up.
In an attempt to assist him, I hopped out the bed and stuffed papers, pens and books into his duffle bag. When he couldn't find the boot for his left foot, we both looked under the bed, and simultaneously stood up. For that moment my cerebral cortex was nonexistent. Finally, he ran down the hall to the bathroom for his "morning pee" jumped two steps at a time down the stairs and the next thing I heard was the sound of the door slamming shut. My first thought. Did he just leave without even brushing his teeth?
He called me an hour ago and told me that he made it to his class, and even had 5 minutes to spare. I asked him if he ever went home to shower, brush, and all that good clean stuff. He laughed and said that he never got the chance to go home, but he did have time to go to the student center at his school to buy a pair of socks. I didn't want to know what the socks were for, but I had to ask. He said he went into the handicap bathroom because it was more private the other ones. He took one sock out and wet it with the hand soap and washed up--like he would at home. As for brushing his teeth, he said, "Oh, I used Dentyne gum, chewing it is like brushing your teeth, but without the brush and toothpaste." With the other sock? he dried off. It could've been worse. he could've used the socks off his feet and put them back on.